The term “codependency”, has become a bit of a buzz word in recent years, along with other attachment labels, however, there is a lot of misleading information out there so this article aims to answer the question, “what is codependency?”, drawing on the perspectives of some of the experts in this field. In this blog post, we’ll explore the definition of codependency, its characteristics, how it can affect both personal and interpersonal growth, and some strategies for overcoming it. Defining Codependency Codependency, is a set of maladaptive emotional attachment strategies that can lead to dysfunctional behavioural patterns in relationships. It usually has its roots in attachment trauma or emotional manipulation during childhood, and manifests in adult relationships later in life. Codependency is often characterised by one person feeling less than, or better than, the other in a relationship, and can lead to one being overly focussed on the needs and feelings of their partner above themselves. This dynamic can create a situation where both people take on a role within the relationship, which enables the other to stay stuck. Stephen Karpman, an American Psychiatrist, demonstrated these roles with his development of the “drama triangle”, in 1968. Using this model, he showed how these dysfunctional roles create power dynamics which rely on each other to maintain their identity. The Karpman Drama Triangle   Karpman, broke these roles down into 3 categories: The Victim The Persecutor The Rescuer These roles can be enacted in many ways and are usually shrouded in (often subconscious) manipulative behaviour, which can be difficult to spot at first glance. These kinds of dynamics are not limited to romantic relationships either, they can develop in friendships, family and even pet owners! The main characteristic of a codependent relationship, is that one enables the other. Often without realising it, each develops a dependency on the other in order to maintain their identity within the relationship. How Codependency Affects Relationships Even though they usually set out with good intentions, codependent partners keep each other emotionally stuck. The “rescuer” keeps the “victim” from finding their autonomy and from being able to stand on their own two feet and resolve/improve their situation. On the other hand, the over-reliance of the “victim”, props up the ego of the “rescuer”, but usually results in them feeling emotionally drained, overwhelmed and trapped. At this point the rescuer can often become a “persecutor”, as their resentment towards the “victim” builds. However, these dynamics can be fluid and complex and do not always result in one person staying in one position on the triangle. It is quite possible for a victim to also be a persecutor for example, and a rescuer/persecutor can also take on the role of victim at times. It is also common for a “victim” type, to fall prey to a “persecutor” type from the start, as the imbalance in self-esteem complement each other (in a negative way). Codependency and Developmental Immaturity    Pia Melody, a leading authority on the concept and treatment of codependency, defines this condition as “developmental immaturity”. She describes it as: “A persistent reliance on and attempts to control external factors, like others’ thoughts and actions, to manage emotions and gain self-worth, often stemming from past abusive situations”. According to Pia Melody’s work, there are 5 key areas that codependecny/development immaturity can manifest: Difficulty experiencing appropriate levels of self-esteem (either feeling less-than, or better-than others or depending on others for external validation) Struggles with setting and maintaining healthy boundaries An inability to own and express one’s reality Difficulties identifying and meeting their own needs and wants Struggles with moderating or containing emotions (some examples of this are “oversharing” inappropriately, emotionally manipulating others, walling off/over-containing information or emotions, control issues etc.) You can find out more about Pia Melody and her work with The Meadows here. Some Key Characteristics of Codependency Poor Boundaries: Codependents often struggle to maintain healthy boundaries. They may feel responsible for other people’s emotions and reactions, leading to a lack of self-identity. People-Pleasing: A common trait of codependency is the constant desire to please others. This might involve sacrificing personal needs or desires to gain approval or avoid conflict. Fear of Abandonment: Many codependent individuals have a profound fear of being abandoned, which can drive them to tolerate unhealthy behaviours in their partners. Low Self-Esteem: Codependency often stems from low self-esteem, where individuals feel unworthy or inadequate, leading them to seek validation through their relationships. Control Issues: In an attempt to maintain their relationship, codependents might engage in controlling behaviours, trying to manage their partner’s actions and decisions. How Codependency Develops in Family Dynamics Codependency is usually a symptom of early life attachment issues, stemming from dysfunctional parenting dynamics. Some examples of this could be: Parents who are overly involved in their children’s lives can lead to enmeshment, a lack of independence, or a sense of needing to please or support the parent/s emotionally. Parents who are rejecting or abandoning can lead the child to become hypervigilant to rejection, emotionally “walled off”, hyper-independent or needless and wantless. When parents rely on their children for mental and emotional support (i.e. for long-term illness, breakdowns in relationships, mental health issues or addictions etc), this can create a sense of the roles being reversed in the parent-child dynamic. This can lead the child to feel like an adult yet without the proper resources to cope with the responsibilities of being one. It can manifest later in life as an over-giver or over-doer in relationships, taking on more responsibility than their share. Which can often lead to them being overbearing and suffocating their partners. Abusive, violent and aggressive parenting can lead to a whole range of codependent dynamics and attachment issues. These can vary widely and can also lead the sufferer finding themselves repeating these patterns in their adult relationships.  Breaking Free from Codependency Recognizing codependent behaviours is the first step towards breaking the cycle. Here are some strategies to help individuals move toward healthier relationship dynamics: Self-Reflection and Awareness.

When you feel the rush and euphoria of gambling coursing through your veins, it can be hard to stop. You’re yearning for just one more throw of the dice because maybe, just maybe, the next time will be your big win – the one that will solve all your problems… That’s how you get stuck in the vicious circle of gambling addiction. Unfortunately, the deck is stacked against you. No casino would be profitable if it were otherwise. And the habit is genuinely expensive. So, what does gambling addiction look like and is there a way out? What does gambling addiction look like? Just like any other addiction, gambling can take over your life. You only remember the rare wins and the euphoria, so you’ll do anything to feel that way again. And the more money you lose, the more obsessed you become with gaining it back. The stakes are sky-high and the need to win swallows you whole. It starts quite innocently. Maybe you buy a weekly lottery ticket, place a bet on a horse or play some poker. Anticipation of the result matches your excitement! And perhaps you get lucky early on and win a decent sum. So, you go back for more. But the innocent habit becomes a real issue when you can’t seem to stop even if the odds aren’t that great. You stop doing it for fun and instead feel compelled to gamble some more. When you start gambling more than you can afford and go into debt, that’s when you’ve lost all control over your addiction. And you’ve probably lost the trust of your loved ones along the way. Some people realise they have a problem and ask for help early enough. But others get to the point of losing everything – their job, money, family and even their home – before they recognise they need help. Here are a few signs that can help you detect if you have a gambling addiction: You’ve lost interest in other activities you used to enjoy You can’t stop thinking about gambling You lie to others (and yourself) about your gambling You need to borrow money, skip paying bills or go into debt to finance your habit You’re neglecting your family, work and personal needs You’re arguing a lot with your loved ones You need to raise the stakes to get the same rush You feel irritable, anxious and ‘on edge’ all the time You always tell yourself you’ll stop, but you never do Healing gambling addiction can be challenging. But wherever you are in your journey, just know that there is hope. There is a way out. Talking therapies are a common approach since there is no pill for gambling. Hypnotherapy for gambling addiction is one of the more successful approaches. Hypnotherapy for gambling addiction Hypnotherapy leads you into a relaxed state of mind where you’re able to access your unconscious mind. With the help of your hypnotherapist, you can search for and identify the root cause of your addiction, as well as transform the thoughts and behaviour patterns that encourage your addiction. It’s a deep dive into your own psychology. But there’s a caveat: you have to want to change your behaviour. You need to accept and admit to yourself that you have a problem. Otherwise, the therapy most likely won’t be successful. Because of what we’ve seen in films, we often perceive hypnosis as a state where others control us and tell us what to think and how to behave. But the reality is nowhere near that. There is no magic trick. A hypnotherapist is only a guide who helps you navigate the labyrinths of your subconscious. But it is you who has to do all the heavy lifting. And you have to be willing to do the hard work. To face your fears and past experiences that shaped you. To learn about your triggers and practise new ways of reacting to them. To face the truth of your addiction. If you’re ready to do that, then hypnotherapy can help you dismantle your craving and replace it with something more positive. You can gain back control over your life. It’s a process and a journey, but one well worth taking! If you’re interested in learning more about how hypnotherapy for gambling addiction can help you, book free consultations with me. I offer hypnotherapy in London or online and would be glad to help you out on your journey to healing!  

ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), is becoming much more common in recent times, with more adults coming forward for diagnosis. As someone who is myself diagnosed as neurodivergent, I understand the struggles that this can cause. As we learn more about managing the symptoms, many people are turning to NLP Coaching for ADHD.  This is because NLP Coaching offers powerful techniques for calming the mind and building new healthy habits. With a unique way of working with the unconscious mind, it is possible to break free of some of these symptoms. NLP can help overcome procrastination, change our perspective on tasks and routines, shift negative thinking patterns, build resilience and confidence. Living with ADHD Neurodivergent disorders such as ADHD can often create a sense of being different or less than others in some way. It can be a confusing and frustrating way to live, as your ability to manage life can vary from day to day. This can leave you feeling overwhelmed and defeated, and can be especially hard to overcome alone. Because it has a very individual approach, NLP Coaching can help you identify and shift limiting beliefs you may have about yourself that could be holding you back. But ADHD isn’t all BAD! I truly believe that it is a superpower and that with the right tools to manage the challenges, you can unlock your unique greatness. If you struggle with ADHD, or are thinking about getting tested, you may benefit from NLP Coaching for ADHD. What Is ADHD? ADHD stands for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. It affects approximately 3-5% of children and 2% adults, according to 2019 data. It’s a mental health condition that impacts a person’s behaviour. They can be restless and may have a harder time focusing and controlling their impulses. Sometimes in a way that can make everyday life challenging. It’s also not uncommon for them to have difficulties with anxiety and sleep. People with ADHD are usually diagnosed sometime during childhood, but the diagnosis can also be given at a later time. It has been suggested that with all the distractions and attention steeling technology we have these days, might be one of the reasons that more people believe they have symptoms of ADHD. It’s important that the diagnosis is made by a professional. But here’s a quick list of some common ADHD symptoms: Easily distracted Difficulty following conversations, movie plots or instructions Forgetfulness and often losing stuff Restlessness or frequent fidgeting  Feeling overwhelmed by small tasks or changes in schedules Talking a lot and often interrupting others Trouble regulating emotions, anxiousness and irritability  It’s difficult for them to wait their turn and can be impulsive or impatient   Photo by energepic.com Adults with ADHD have mostly learned to cope in one way or another, so their symptoms may not be as obvious as a child’s. But they may still feel restless on the inside and like they’re falling behind their peers. ADHD can also make it difficult for people to thrive in a work environment. This is because they may struggle with time management, stress, following instructions and focusing on their tasks. ADHD is becoming much more common and we’re still not sure what causes it. Genetics can play a role, but we now know that early life trauma, premature births or drug and alcohol abuse during pregnancy also seem to be risk factors. Some people turn to medications, which can be helpful. Recently, alternative options such as NLP coaching have started gaining traction, especially for those who prefer a natural approach. Can NLP Coaching Help with Your ADHD? Short for Neuro-Linguistic Programming, NLP combines psychological and linguistic knowledge to help us understand ourselves and our past experiences in a way that helps us make behavioural changes in the present. The language you use when you’re talking to others (and yourself!) can tell you a lot about your unconscious beliefs and views of the world. NLP is not a cure, but it can help you shift beliefs and manage behaviours connected to your symptoms. This can make it easier to function, feel calmer and enjoy life more.   Working with an NLP Coach can also help you to find new ways to overcome mental blocks, build healthy habits and make your goals more achievable. NLP tools and techniques reflect the belief that everyone has a unique way of learning. Once you know what yours is, you can create an approach that works for you! ADHD makes it difficult for people to fulfil society’s expectations and raises their need for an individual approach to success. NLP is a powerful tool that can help you untangle your ADHD’s mental and emotional patterns and support your growth. When you change the way you talk to yourself and how you see the world, you can regain control. NLP coaching for ADHD can help you learn how to understand and accept yourself and find ways to make life work for you.  If you’d like to discuss how I can support you with NLP Coaching, please get in touch. You can book a free consultation below. I’m looking forward to speaking with you!      

Did you know that the NHS estimates that around 10% of the UK population struggle with claustrophobia at some point in their lives? That’s not a small number! So, if this is your fight at the moment, it’s important to know that you’re not alone and there is a way out. Hypnotherapy for claustrophobia can help many feel significant relief and even heal completely. But what is claustrophobia exactly? Claustrophobia is an intense fear of enclosed spaces and getting stuck in them without a way out. It can be mild or severe, from you feeling uncomfortable in tight spaces to directly plunging into a panic attack. As it progresses, claustrophobia can become increasingly limiting to one’s everyday life – some may not be able to leave their house, or even room!  That’s why it’s best to start treating it as early as possible. Symptoms of Claustrophobia Claustrophobia is one of the more famous phobias – irrational feelings of dread when the chances of something bad happening to us is extremely unlikely. People with phobias often go out of their way to avoid their triggers. Those suffering from claustrophobia will tend to avoid confined spaces like lifts, trains, planes, public toilets, revolving doors and so on. Such behaviour often leads to a lower quality of life because it becomes hard to enjoy everyday life. And it makes it almost impossible to travel! Claustrophobia symptoms can range in severity and may include:   Sweating Trembling Difficulty breathing High blood pressure Tightness in the chest or chest pain Feeling sick or needing to go to the bathroom Feeling faint and dizzy Ringing in your ears Fear of dying Panic attacks If you’re thinking about how all that sounds a lot like anxiety, you’re right. People who suffer from claustrophobia often experience mild to severe anxiety, sometimes when even just thinking about certain triggers. And panic attacks aren’t that uncommon. It’s the kind of phobia that can easily escalate. If you don’t start treating it soon enough, it becomes so damn easy to just avoid the places that make you feel uncomfortable. And before you know it, your radius of movement becomes smaller and smaller as the world seems more dangerous. Claustrophobia limits not only your life, but also the lives of your loved ones as you become increasingly dependent on them. This puts a strain on personal relationships. So, let the people you care about become, besides your own happiness, yet another reason worth fighting for. Common Causes Traumatic events in childhood can cause claustrophobia later on in life. If you were ever abused, bullied, trapped or kept in a confined space, that may be what’s causing your phobia to flare up today. People whose parents have suffered from claustrophobia are also more likely to experience it in their lives because they might associate confined spaces with their parent’s intense emotional reactions. Sometimes, though, claustrophobia doesn’t stem from your childhood, but from a bad experience. Getting stuck on a train, locked up in a garage or going through some major turbulence while on a plane can all be strong negative emotional experiences. Especially if you’re already going through a very stressful period. Such events can send you in a downward spiral of anxiety, fear and avoidance. The sooner you manage to break away from the vicious circle, the better odds you’ll have in healing. But even if you can’t remember the last time you went out of the house, you can get better! It just might take more work. How Can Hypnotherapy for Claustrophobia Help you? So far, we’ve learned that claustrophobia can cause intense physical and psychological symptoms that push you into a fight or flight response. Also, it’s often caused by childhood trauma or bad experiences in enclosed spaces. Hypnotherapy can be an effective solution because it uses relaxation techniques to help your body come down from the fight-or-flight overdrive. Your hypnotherapist will try to create a safe space where you can feel comfortable and guide you to relax your muscles and slow your breathing down. You can also ask them to teach you some techniques that you can use on your own to intentionally relax in challenging situations. Learning how to self-soothe will help you gain more control over your body! Relaxation of the body opens up the path to the subconscious mind. This is where your hypnotherapist can guide you to observe and work through your past experiences and face your phobia at its core. It’s not easy work, though, and it may take you some time to get there. And that’s okay! Exposure therapy is important for treating any phobia and sometimes, a great starting point is in your head! Hypnotherapy can help you practice facing your triggers in your mind. Your hypnotherapist will encourage you and help you see how you can craft a new, mindful response to a dreadful situation. For example, hypnotherapy for claustrophobia can help you visualise calling an elevator. Standing at its open door. And then maybe even entering and taking a ride. Whatever it is, you can practice in your mind before doing it in real life. It’s especially useful if your claustrophobia is severe. It’s important to note that during a hypnotherapy session, you are not a passive participant, and the hypnotherapist is not a wizard that will just make your fears disappear. You have to actively work through your fear. Your hypnotherapist is there to support and guide you, so you’re not left alone when the going gets tough. If you feel like this approach might help you, I’d encourage you to give it a chance. Try hypnotherapy for claustrophobia in London and get your life back!   Book a FREE consultation with me.  

Tossing and turning all night just to catch an hour or two of sleep can feel excruciating. Especially if it happens too often. Not being able to sleep brings about more than just tiredness. Anxiety, irritability, aggression and physical illness can all ensue. If this sounds too familiar, you might want to try hypnotherapy for insomnia. It’s a non-invasive approach to solving sleep issues. And it’s becoming more and more popular!  But, is there any merit in this approach? Read on to find out. What Is Insomnia? All of us have experienced an occasional sleepless night.  It usually happens when we’re very nervous or too excited about the day ahead. Jet lag or too much caffeine are also common causes. But true insomnia is not a one-night occurrence. People who suffer from it toss and turn regularly. Insomnia can be temporary, lasting anywhere from a single night to as long as four weeks. And it can be chronic, persisting longer than four weeks. This type often appears because of chronic pain or as a side effect of certain medications. Many people come to me for Hypnotherapy for insomnia in London, when they’ve tried everything else but nothing works. If you’re struggling with insomnia, you may experience some common symptoms. The most common symptoms are:   Inability to fall asleep Inability to stay asleep Waking up multiple times during the night Waking up too early Irritability Difficulty to focus or function properly Feeling tired or groggy Insomnia can lower your work performance and put a strain on your relationships. That’s why it shouldn’t be ignored. And why would you ignore it when there are some really effective steps you can take today! Is Hypnotherapy for Insomnia Effective? There is some decent research showing that hypnotherapy can indeed be an effective solution for insomnia and other sleep disorders. That’s especially so if you can’t clearly pinpoint a single reason for your sleepless nights.  For some people persistent physical or mental tension can be the cause. A certified hypnotherapist can teach you how to relax and let go of your daily stressors, at least for a while. Deep controlled breathing, “scanning” your body with your mind or progressive relaxation are all frequently used relaxation techniques. You can even learn to do them on your own! They’re great hacks to use when you’re struggling to fall asleep. Your hypnotherapist can also teach you some self-hypnosis techniques that’ll help you calm your mind. Guided visualisations can be of great use here! Especially if you feel like you just can’t stop thinking. But most importantly, hypnotherapy for insomnia can help you solve potential psychological causes – issues and struggles that keep you awake at night. Learn more about your triggers and make peace with your past. Everyone is different and it’s up to you when you feel it’s the right time to reach out for help. But you don’t have to struggle alone. If you’ve tried lots of other techniques and treatments, it might be worth seeing how I can help you with Hypnotherapy for insomnia in London or worldwide online. And if you can’t sleep because of chronic pain, there’s good news! Hypnotherapy is considered an effective solution that significantly decreases pain in a variety of illnesses. And it has no side effects. It’s worth a try, don’t you think? Tips to help you sleep better Photo by Ketut Subiyanto: Ok, so now you know how hypnotherapy for insomnia might help you.  But maybe you’re not entirely sure if you really need professional help. Or you have to wait a few days for your first session, but you could really use some relief now. Luckily, there are some lifestyle changes you can make. It’s generally a good idea to try to stick to these habits because they can really do wonders for your stress and energy levels. I suggest you choose at least one and try to implement it over the next few days.  It will even make your therapy more effective! So, here are some healthy, sleep-inducing habits you can start implementing immediately. 1. Build a sleep routine If your days are stressful and full of obligations, it’s important to give your body consistent cues when the time comes to wind down. Decide on a fixed hour when you’d like to fall asleep. And then, create a bedtime routine that starts 2 to 3 hours beforehand. Dim the lights in your house, put your kids to sleep, take a shower, cuddle with your significant other or read a relaxing book.  Also, make space for self-soothing and relaxation techniques that your hypnotherapist has taught you! Create a string of activities that you love and that relax you. And then engage in them consistently. With time, your body will learn when it’s time to wind down and prepare for sleep. 2. Regular exercise It’s not unusual for people who have a desk job and don’t move their bodies much to feel restless at night. Stress accumulates in their bodies because they never let it out (aside from randomly snapping at someone…) Regular exercise helps you digest and shake off all the tension. Plus, exercise makes your brain release ‘happy hormones’ that lift up your mood and give you extra energy. But the most important part is this – working out makes your body tired. And a tired body is more likely to fall asleep. 3. Limit exposure to screens Our screens give us interesting insight into other people’s lives. But the blue light they emit messes with our brain. It suppresses the secretion of melatonin – a hormone that signals to our body that it’s time to get some rest. Without melatonin, our body gets confused and thinks it needs to stay awake.  That’s why your bedtime routine should exclude all screens. But the blue light isn’t the only thing that keeps you awake. Watching emotionally provoking content before bedtime can really get you riled up and even push you into anxiety or anger. It’s

Are you exhausted from the constant struggle of trying to live a normal life with OCD? You’re not alone! There are around three-quarters of a million people in the UK who struggle with OCD. The condition can feel incredibly crippling. And without treatment, it can easily get worse. Hypnotherapy for OCD in London or online can give you extra support on your journey to healing. It is possible to get better! So, why not explore your options? Read on to learn more about what hypnotherapy can do for you. What Is OCD? People who suffer from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) struggle with obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviours. And the condition intrudes into their daily lives. Irresistible urges come as they please. You may feel compelled to wash your hands repeatedly, turn taps or lights on and off, or clean and scrub until your fingers bleed. These are just some of the examples of involuntary behaviour you may experience. Such actions are often fueled by obsessive thoughts that you just can’t stop thinking about. They often revolve around strong feelings of dread. Some common fears are of: death germs or dirt losing control bad things happening hurting yourself or others They often cause heavy anxiety that compels OCD sufferers into certain behaviours. And it’s because they bring temporary relief! But they can never fully relax. This is why many OCD sufferers feel enslaved by their condition. It’s like a vicious cycle of intrusive thoughts, overwhelming anxiety, compulsive behaviour and brief relief. But then another troubling thought arises, and you’re back at square one. The causes of OCD may be genetic or may come from certain disruptions in information processing of the brain. But it can also stem from emotional, environmental and developmental factors. It’s often treated with medication and traditional psychological approaches like CBT or exposure therapy. Some people will find relief from that approach, but for others, it just won’t be effective enough. That’s when it’s a good idea to try an alternative! Here’s how hypnotherapy for OCD can help you. Hypnotherapy for OCD Before we get into more detail, it’s important to note that OCD is a complex issue. That’s why the solution is rarely simple. It’s very useful to know your triggers so that you can better manage your symptoms. But that alone won’t change your behaviour. The main assumption is that OCD thoughts and behaviours are deeply rooted in the subconscious. It’s why they’re so irresistible. And that’s exactly where hypnotherapy can be so powerful! OCD is, at its core, an anxiety disorder. While more research is needed when it comes to treating OCD with hypnotherapy, there are some promising studies. They show hypnotherapy’s effectiveness in reducing general anxiety. And since anxiety leads to compulsive behaviour, hypnotherapy can step in to loosen its grip. Relaxation of the body and the mind is the basis of any hypnosis session. A certified hypnotherapist will know how to create a safe space for you to let go and relax. They will gently guide you into a state of hypnosis. There, you’ll be able to explore your thoughts, triggers, urges and behaviours. And their root cause! The goal of hypnotherapy for OCD is to help lessen the power that those urges and obsessions have over you. And if you’re able to reduce the anxiety, you’ll also be able to control your compulsions better. A high-quality hypnotherapist can assist you in resolving past traumas and inner conflicts that exacerbate your symptoms. This might even remove certain triggers! Photo by Pixabay All in all, hypnotherapy for OCD in London or online can be an ideal additional treatment on your path to healing. If you’re considering trying hypnotherapy in London, feel free to book a free consultation with me.

Are you dreaming about exploring a far-away place but would rather die than get on a plane? But imagine what it would be like if you could just say yes to the next trip abroad with your family or friends. All the vistas you could see and new people you could meet! Well, hypnotherapy for fear of flying could make that a reality. If you’re sceptical, just know that hypnosis is not what they show you in films. It can be an effective solution for all kinds of phobias, including the fear of flying. So, you don’t have to let your fears dictate where you’ll spend your holidays anymore. Read on to learn more about how hypnotherapy in East London can help you. What does fear of flying look like? Fear of flying is a common phobia. The main issue is that it’s not just active during a flight. It can seriously lower the quality of life for weeks or even months before take-off. Trouble sleeping, procrastination and constant worry that ruins your ability to focus. Those are all symptoms of anticipatory anxiety that often comes with phobias. Even thinking about flying can trigger anxiety, let alone boarding a flight. It doesn’t sound like a great way to start a holiday, does it? And then the day of your trip arrives. You may feel physically sick. Rapid breathing, dry mouth, excessive sweating, bowel or bladder issues, shaking, feelings of claustrophobia and even panic attacks. All of that may be a part of your flying experience. It’s important to understand that most often, the flying phobia is not just about flying. It can be a mixture of many different fears! Like that of a plane crash, plane hijacking, death, confined spaces, bad weather or even not finding a toilet in time. All in all, the phobia makes the whole experience extremely stressful and exhausting. Especially because there’s often a return flight too! This means that most people with fear of flying won’t be able to relax and enjoy their holidays properly. It’s no wonder then that many people resort to avoidant behaviour and try to avoid flying as much as they possibly can. That’s extremely common in people with phobias. But avoiding planes is a hard blow to anyone who dreams about travelling. Imagine all the beautiful places in the world that you could explore if you could just take control of your fear of flying! What if I told you that there is an effective solution for that?   Hypnotherapy for fear of flying Photo by Rakicevic Nenad: Pexels Hypnotherapy is a powerful tool that can help you find relief from your symptoms. Or even get rid of them for good! Hypnotherapy for fear of flying dives deep into your subconscious. There, it can break down any past events that helped create your phobia. You can then analyse them and work on resolving your negative experiences to create new, positive associations with flying. Resolving your fear at its core means you’ll be able to make a lasting change! Your hypnotherapist will help you learn to relax your body at will and they’ll teach you how to do it on your own. You can use the techniques before or during a flight to bring your body back from a stressed-out state to a calm one. Imagine if you were finally able to manage your symptoms! Hypnotherapy for fear of flying aims to reconstruct your thoughts and behaviours about flying. What can I expect in a hypnotherapy session? Hypnosis is a state in which your mind is more open to suggestions. That’s why you can use it to convince your mind that not only is flying not dangerous but that it can be a positive experience. To do that, a hypnotherapist might ask you to envision a space where you feel safe. Imagine all the details, colours, scents and sensations. Feeling safe is a great starting point for any change! It is from here that you can start to explore the root causes of your fear. And transform them into something more supportive. Through the power of suggestion and relaxation, hypnotherapy will teach your brain to be calmer, feel safer and more in control. Some people are able to get on a plane with almost no symptoms after only a few sessions. But others might need more work. Everyone’s healing journey is unique, and that’s okay! If you’d like to give hypnosis a try to get rid of your fear of flying, I offer hypnotherapy in East London or online. Book a free consultation and set yourself free to spend your holidays wherever you’d like!  

Did you know that it is estimated that 1 in 6 people have encountered a mental health problem in the past week? Yes, more and more people are struggling with feelings of depression, fear and anxiety. And sometimes, it happens to us. That’s why it’s essential to learn more about how to improve mental health! And the fact that you’re here, reading about how to get better, raises the odds in your favour. A recent study has found that people who believe they can improve their mental health do indeed tend to have greater mental well-being. So, your journey of healing has already started. Nevertheless, here are 5 ways to support your mental health! 1) Make sure you’re getting enough sleep Sleep, exercise, healthy eating…all that is necessary for you to feel good in your body. Including your brain! Don’t skip on sleep unless you really have to. A 2022 research has shown that the brain processes and balances emotions during REM sleep. It “helps to reinforce positive emotions and weaken strongly negative or traumatic emotions during REM sleep.” So, plenty of high-quality sleep will ease your negative feelings and help you keep a more positive outlook. This is why sleep can be of immense help when you’re going through a difficult period! 2) Eat nutrient-rich foods Your junk food, and low nutrient diet doesn’t help your mental health. At all! Poor diet means you’re starving your body of essential nutrients. Yes, even if you’re overweight! Another 2022 study has found that diet improvements help beat depression in young men with poor diets. There are many reasons why diet affects how we feel. For example, did you know that more than 90% of serotonin, one of the ‘happy hormones’, is made by your gut microbes? If your diet chronically lacks fibre, you’re starving your microbes, and they produce less serotonin. So, the next time you order a pizza to save some time on meal-prep, ask yourself if it’s really worth it. Sometimes it might be! Just don’t make it a habit. 3) Move your body to improve your mental health Movement is the most natural thing for our bodies. Sometimes it may not feel like it, especially if we’re used to spending most of our time sitting or lounging on our couch. But regular exercise does make us feel better! Our bodies create more serotonin and dopamine when in action. Both hormones help reduce stress and improve our mood, quality of sleep, digestion, memory and even our libidos. Plus, when we feel strong and capable in our bodies, our self-esteem soars! We feel ready to take on any challenge that comes our way. It can be difficult to start exercising, but the long-term benefits are so damn worth it! Start out slow and steady. You don’t have to spend hours in the gym. Go hiking, swimming or dancing. Have sex, jog or go and earn yourself a karate belt. Options are endless, so try things out until you find something you enjoy. 4) Connect with others If you’re wondering how to improve mental health, invest your time into building meaningful relationships with others. Having a support network when life takes a turn can do so much for our mental health! When you can talk about your feelings and issues with someone you trust, it makes you feel less alone in your struggles. Also, helping and caring for others makes us feel like we’re important members of our community and that we have something valuable to give. It makes us feel like we belong. Like we matter. Many people even find their purpose in helping others because they feel valued when they see that they can change someone’s life for the better. So, find the time to connect with people that matter to you. And do it face to face whenever possible. No amount of instant messages can replace a loving hug! 5) Learn to take a break when you need it I know, I know. You have a loooong list of obligations. Of things that need to get done and of people who rely on you.   But how much can you really give if you’re running on fumes? Sometimes, taking a break is the best thing you can do for yourself and for others. Go for a walk in nature, take a nap or find 30 minutes to just drink your coffee in peace. Pick up an old hobby and schedule rest days in your calendar. Try some meditation to ease your worries and calm an overactive mind. Whatever it is, find a way to take care of yourself. And if you can’t possibly find the time to do so… Ask for help! You don’t have to do everything alone! Turn to your spouse, a friend or a family member and let them help you carry your burden. You can also hire some external support, like a nanny, coach or a hypnotherapist. When to seek help? Photo by Anna Shvets : Pexels If you’ve been trying different things for a while and your mental health isn’t getting any better, it might be time to seek help. Your life doesn’t have to be a daily struggle! Whether you suffer from mild symptoms or an outright clinical diagnosis, you can get better and live a fulfilled life once again. And it’s okay if you need help to get there. I needed it too! How to improve mental health with hypnotherapy and NLP in London? Hypnotherapy can help you relax your body and give it a break from the constant stress. It creates a safe space where you can explore your fears, anxieties and difficult memories to learn and heal from them. A certified hypnotherapist will gently guide you through all that. They can help you change your behaviours and give you the tools to better handle difficult emotions in everyday life. Hypnotherapy is a great additional treatment for addictions, PTSD, anxiety and chronic pain management. NLP coaching can teach you

Many of us grew up admiring perfection. From our Barbie dolls to brave heroes of our favourite childhood movies, success and flawlessness often seemed so simple to achieve. And now still, so many wish to have that life, to be that person. We admire it. We praise it. We want it. People who get caught up chasing the ideal often become perfectionists. But what is perfectionism, really? Simply put, perfectionism is the need and belief that we have to be and do everything perfectly. This trait is often seen as helpful and supporting of a successful life. The main assumption is that such people are highly motivated to achieve their goals. Because if you aim for perfection, you’re going to work hard. And if you work hard, you’ll achieve everything you want, right? Well, it’s not that simple. Is perfectionism useful? We often assume that mistakes are our enemies. They make us feel like a failure. So I guess it’s reasonable that we try to make them go away. The other thing is that many people hide their struggles, but flaunt their achievements. And if we only see others living their best lives, it’s easy to start believing that we’re the only ones who struggle. So, if you want to be as successful as everyone else, just don’t make any mistakes! Easy! Just be perfect like they are and you’re good to go. The main problem with this? There is no such thing as ‘perfect’. Everyone struggles in one way or another. Even if they don’t seem like it. That’s just the reality of being human. Perfectionism is an unattainable goal. Setting the bar too high only creates more disappointment in all areas of life. The reality of perfectionism is that it’s a giant serving of stress seasoned with unmet expectations. Research has shown that it’s tightly related to various mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, eating disorders, OCD and even self-harm. Perfectionists often feel paralysed in their actions because nothing is ever good enough. So, their progress in life can be slower than for their more laid back peers. And even when they do achieve great results in life, they do it with much more stress. Plus, they probably still think they could’ve, no, should’ve done better. You see, what you thought was good about perfectionism is actually doing you harm. You’re in a wild goose chase and you don’t even know it! That’s the biggest trap of perfectionism. You can never catch the rainbow called perfection. There simply is no such thing. Signs of perfectionism In case you’re not sure if you’re a perfectionist or not, here’s a list to help you out: You’re only focusing on results It’s hard for you to enjoy the process of learning or working. Your eyes are set on the end goal and once you check that box, you’re immediately looking for the next one. You can’t relax until you finish a task You tend to work late hours and often sacrifice your free time to the task at hand. This also means that it’s unusual for you to skip lunch with friends so you can finish what you’ve started. You might not even have friends outside of work! Your relationships often suffer and you tend to be overworked. You (and others) rarely meet your expectations You always think that when you achieve something, you’ll be happy. You’ll be enough. But you never are. Or so you think. Also, you get easily disappointed in others. There’s always that one thing that bothers you and you just can’t let it go. You’re very critical and have low self-esteem You’re chronically unhappy with your life. You always see so much room for improvement, but no matter how hard you try, you feel like you’ve barely made any progress. Nothing and no one is ever good enough (including you). This tends to push people away. You’re motivated by fear, not desire The reason you can’t relax is that you can’t stop thinking about what’ll happen if you make a mistake. Or if you miss a deadline. Or if you turn your paper in before you meticulously check it 5 times in a row. Your fear keeps you working and you might not even know what it is you really want from life. You procrastinate If your fear doesn’t keep you grinding, then it probably keeps you glued to your sofa. You put things off to the last minute because you’re scared of doing them imperfectly. You feel paralyzed, but you don’t know why. You’re quick to put yourself down You’re quick to judge yourself for any little mistake you make. It might not even be a real mistake! You beat yourself up for not reaching your target when, in fact, you set it too far away to begin with. How to heal from perfectionism with cognitive hypnotherapy in London Photo by Tirachard Kumtanom – Pexels Embracing vulnerability is one way to defeat perfectionism. Leaning into your discomfort and accepting your imperfect human nature can do so much for your stress levels. When you learn how to be compassionate to your past and present self, you can start living your life with more ease. You’ll find more room for joy, and you might even start celebrating your successes, no matter how small they may be. You can learn to let go of perfectionism and comparison with the help of cognitive hypnotherapy. In London, the level of competitiveness is almost sky-high. It’s no wonder then that so many people in this gorgeous city struggle with unrealistic expectations. But there are also plenty of opportunities to find just the right type of support to help you heal from perfectionism. Hypnotherapy creates a safe space for you to process and face your fears if you wish to. It can help you dig down deep into your past to discover the root cause of your perfectionism. A trusted hypnotherapist will help you see things from a different perspective

Do you dread the arrival of summer? Shorts, bikinis, tank tops…The thought of having to wear any of that makes you feel anxious. Or maybe you go into overload with dieting and too much exercise, trying to look just perfect for the beach. If you struggle with body image, you know what I’m talking about. And I feel where you’re coming from because, honestly, social media does not make it easy for us to feel confident in our bodies. It’s a real struggle. Plus, if people in your life, body shame you (or bodies like yours), well, it’s no wonder it’s difficult for you to love your body. And yet, our body is our home. When we start treating it with the love and care that any home deserves, everything changes. Life becomes more colourful. But, how can we do that? Let’s dive deeper into it! Effects of low self-esteem Self-esteem is how we view ourselves. All the opinions, beliefs and judgements we have about ourselves can make or break our confidence. When we have low self-esteem, we think negatively about our bodies, hearts and minds. We feel less capable. So, we shy away from new opportunities and challenges. This makes us feel safe in the beginning, but the longer we avoid things, the more our insecurities grow. Our every mistake stops us in our tracks because we immediately see it as proof of our unworthiness. Hating your body can make it difficult to trust potential romantic partners. Your relationships may suffer, and you may even experience bouts of jealousy. People with low self-esteem often choose unsuitable partners because they believe they don’t deserve any better. And let’s not even mention all the beach parties you missed because you were ashamed of your body. It can be so easy to conclude that your confidence depends on how you look. But that’s not true! Confidence is not a matter of looks. The truth is that our self-esteem was heavily influenced by how people around us treated us as we grew up. And that might not have anything to do with your looks. This includes our family, friends, teachers and so on. So, if you grew up in a surrounding that was very critical of you, it was more difficult for you to develop confidence. Luckily, as adults, we can take the reins back. We can create a new narrative for ourselves and rewire our brains. We can learn to love ourselves and our bodies even if they are imperfect. Now, let me tell you a secret…all bodies are imperfect! Why would IG models need filters and photoshop if they weren’t? How to improve low self-esteem with hypnotherapy in London Photo by Alena Shekhovtcova – Pexels Now, London is a highly competitive city. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of comparison. Especially when you see all those successful-looking beautiful people strolling down Oxford street. But, the upside of living in such a big city is that there are so many professionals that can help you build your confidence. Hypnotherapy is a very gentle practise that leads you into a relaxed state. In it, you can safely explore your problems, allow yourself to feel difficult emotions and even take a stroll down memory lane in search of the root cause. All the while, your hypnotherapist will be your guide. They can support you and give advice on how to handle challenging emotions. Also, they can help you be more mindful of your thoughts and reactions. You’ll also be able to learn some useful tools to use in everyday situations. No matter your body type, hypnotherapy can help you develop self-esteem. One approach is by resolving damaging beliefs and past trauma. The other is by helping you change the habits that keep you treating your body badly. Be it’s bingeing, dieting, over-exercising, poor sleep, addictions or something else, hypnotherapy can help you break free from them. And it gives you all the tools to put new, loving habits in place. You know, the ones that will make you feel loved, energised and at peace. So, take advantage of living in a big city and try hypnotherapy in London. I’ve seen my clients achieve such wonderful results, and I know you can too! Contact me to learn more about how I can help you improve low self-esteem. I’m looking forward to talking to you!